Can Someone Get My Old Man a Canadiens Hat?

Dear Montréal,

Two quick questions for you. 

One: Are you ready to blow the doors off for Game 3?

Two: Are you familiar with the movie Kicking & Screaming?

Will Ferrell, Mike Ditka, Robert Duvall. The kid who played Byong Sun. (OK, I looked it up. Elliott Cho, if you’re reading this, you’re a legend.)

If you haven’t seen it, Will Ferrell takes over as the coach of his son’s youth soccer team, and he develops a crippling addiction to coffee in his pursuit of greatness. Incredible premise. I think it won Best Picture in 2005. I don’t know, maybe not. But when you’re 9 years old, anything with Will Ferrell is like The Godfather. Me and my brother probably watched that movie 1,000 times when we were driving to and from hockey tournaments. And maybe this is a hockey thing, or just a generational thing, but I feel like everybody has that one “backseat movie” that absolutely drives their parents up a wall. 

Now I guess kids are just on their phones or whatever, but back in the day, either your parents or your buddies’ parents had the hockey van with the flip-down DVD player in the back. That was our family. We were fortunate enough to have the big stinky van. Me and my brother and anywhere between two to eight of our teammates would be stuffed in the back, and my parents would sit in the front seats and just be tortured by the lines from Kicking & Screaming over and over. I literally don’t even think they’ve ever seen the movie with their own eyes, but my mom can 100% recite the entire script. On long trips, we’d be too lazy to switch out the DVD, so we’d just run it back again....

“Coffee is the lifeblood that fuels the dreams of champions!”

“Go to hell! While you're there, why don't you grab me a juice box!”

(Our parents really loved us, I guess.)

Our whole childhood was basically one long drive to some hockey rink in the Midwest. And yes, this is my backstory. BUCKLE UP, BABY. I know how these things work. 

We grew up in Wisconsin, and if you don’t know much about American hockey, then you probably think, “OK, so that’s like Minnesota and Michigan, right? Powerhouse.” 

But in terms of hockey culture, at least at that time, if you were a Wisconsin kid, everybody kind of looked at you like, “Ehhh. I dunno.”

The competition just wasn’t the same. If you wanted to make a name for yourself, you had to go to play in tournaments in Chicago or Minnesota or Detroit. So that’s what we did. We drove. Or I should say, that’s what my parents did. I didn’t do jack s***! Hahahah. They did all the work. I sat in the back and watched movies and tried to hold my pee like a hero. As I got older — around 12 or 13 — I got a chance to go play for Team Illinois. Without blinking an eye, my dad was like, “Let’s do it.” 

An easy weekend was a 4-hour drive. But sometimes we’d have games in Detroit, and it was 8 hours each way. We’d hit the road after school on Thursday and be gone til Sunday. My mom was a third grade teacher, so she couldn’t leave her class. It would just be me and my dad, and my dad…. Well, he’s a wildman. He coached and ran our local rink. Kind of like the ultimate Hockey Dad. I could talk for hours about him, but this is him in one image…..

You know those old-school hand gripper things that are supposed to make your forearms huge? He had one from like 1982. He would be cruising down the highway gripping the wheel with one hand and crushing sets with the gripper in the other hand. Maniac. And the funniest part was that he loved listening to 80s on 8 on Sirius. So he’s blasting Phil Collins with the windows rolled down, just crushing sets with the gripper. Then he’d hand it over to me. 

“Your turn.” 

“Come on, guy. I’m 12.”

(He flips into coach mode.)

“Shooting is all about the forearms. That’s what people don’t understand....”

“Dad, I can’t feel my thumbs.” 

(Ultimate coach mode)

“Alright, go ahead and take it easy. But there’s another kid out there somewhere working twice as hard as you.”

“There’s a kid out there with … two grippers?”

(This whole conversation takes place while “I Can Feel It Coming In the Air Tonight” is blasting).

Brutal. But hey, I guess it worked. I was an undersized kid, so we were always looking for any kind of edge. My dad had this saying, and it still sticks with me now….

He said, “Once you’re satisfied, it’s time to quit.”

He never made me do anything, but he was always there on Thursday afternoon, behind the wheel, just ready to roll. It’s crazy to me that he never complained about having to drive 60 hours a month so I could have a chance to play against better competition. If it wasn’t for my dad, I never would have made it to the NHL. At my size, coming from a football town in Wisconsin, there’s no way. To be honest, the NHL wasn’t really even my dream at first. It didn’t seem realistic. My dream was to get a free college education and play for the Badgers. 

Everything changed when I got a chance to try out for the USA Hockey National Team Development Program when I was 15. That 2001 birth year was ridiculous. Zegras, Boldy, Turcotte, York, Spencer Knight in net ... and of course you had Jack Hughes. He was definitely the big dog already. I had played against him in tournaments a few times and I must have pissed him off or something, because when I got to the camp, he was looking at me like, “...........this guy.” 

I knew I had to do something to make my mark, but I was so in my head about playing “the right way” and “not cheating the game” and all that stuff. Well, I played so right that I didn’t do jack s*** out there. I was Mr. Dump-and-Chase. I don’t think I had a single point in any of the games. I definitely didn’t score.

I told my dad before the last game, “I think I blew it.” 

But I got a lucky bounce, because the coach at the time was John Wroblewski. I don’t know what he saw in me, but he saw something. Wrobs was in his office near the end of camp, and Jack was in there talking to him about final cuts. 

He told Jack, “I think we’re gonna take this kid.” 

(Me.)

Jack said, “Wait, what do you mean?”

Wrobs said, “We’re taking Cole.” 

“We’re taking Cole?”

“What’s the problem?”

“I don’t know, it’s just like .......................... Why?”

Hahaha. That was Jack’s scouting report on me. Cole Caufield: Just why?

Thank God that Wrobs saw the hockey player in me. And I think it worked out pretty well for Jack, too. We became really good friends, and really good linemates. Making that team changed my life. It allowed me to live out my dream at the University of Wisconsin, playing alongside my brother. And it obviously got me to the Montréal Canadiens, which I hate to even say is a dream, because it’s something that’s almost too cool to have dreamed about when I was young. 

I don’t know if too many rookies in NHL history had the whirlwind I had. One day I’m in my college apartment in Madison playing PlayStation … and 3 months later I’m playing in the Stanley Cup Finals.

When I got called up at the end of the 2021 regular season, I didn’t even think I was going to play. We were on a road trip out west, and I was just along for the ride. Healthy scratch. Get acclimated. Practice with the guys. And man, those were some guys. Shea Weber. Carey Price. Eric Staal. Corey Perry. Tyler Toffoli. I was coming into that room probably looking like the water boy. I couldn’t have been more starstruck. We’re at a morning skate in Calgary, and it was a bag skate, of course. I’m thinking I’m going back to the hotel for a nice nap, throw on the suit, sit up in the press box and have a Gatorade. 

We’re on the bus and somebody tells me, “Hey, you’re playing tonight.” 

I thought they were joking. 

I said, “Oh my God, we just bag skated. I’m toast.” 

I called my parents and my brother, and that was an awesome moment, just them getting choked up and saying, “We’ll be watching you on TV.”

That was the hardest nap of my life. I couldn’t even sit still. I mean…. I’m somebody who started skating in diapers. Me and my brother used to watch the NHL and be playing carpet hockey in full gear in the living room, pretending that we were those guys. I demanded to wear my hockey socks and everything. So yeah, that night in Calgary was pretty much the greatest 15 minutes and even plus-minus of my life. 

I thought that was probably going to be it — a couple games at the end of the season. But we had a few injuries, and somehow I ended up in the playoff lineup. Everything went so fast that I don’t even think I had time to be nervous. I’ll never forget, I was just so happy to be there and so amped up that we were at a morning practice at the start of Round 2 against Winnipeg, and we’re just supposed to be warming up the goalies, right? Nice and easy. 

We’re in the shootout line, and I get up to the front, and I had this goosebumps moment where I guess it finally sunk in like, “You’re a Montréal Canadien. You’re coming down on Carey Price right now. This is unbelievable.” 

I came flying down like a bat out of hell at a freaking morning practice after Game 2 of a playoff series — guys are literally still yawning, stretching — and I absolutely rip one on net.

As soon as I let it go, I thought, Oh s***.

I smoked Carey right in the face. The sound was insane. Everybody stopped. You could have heard a pin drop in there. All I could think was, Is Shea looking at me? Is he going to kill me?

I wanted to dig a hole in the ice and hide. 

Thank God, it was Carey Price. He shook it off like it was nothing, and he’s the chillest guy ever, so he wasn’t even mad at me. 

But then I skated back to the line and one of our vets just looked at me and said…. 

“Hey kid?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t ever f****** do that again.”

Noted. Noted. 

I think I went five-hole on Carey for the next two months. The puck never left the ice. 

That Stanley Cup run was so intense that I don’t think I even had time to be nervous. Coming out of COVID, and after not having fans in the arena for so long, I know how much it meant to the city of Montréal. We didn’t get the good ending, but it was a great ride, and I know me and Nick took so much from that experience as young guys. My dad always said that it’s not failure if you learn something from it, and you definitely learn something from every handshake line at the end of a series.

I’ll never forget seeing a picture of Kucherov dapping me up in the line after that Final. It was so surreal to me, being 20 years old. Everything just happened so fast. Crazy that was 5 years ago now. Obviously, we’re a different team. Tampa is a different team. But here we are again, battling it out in the playoffs. And thank god we got a full Bell Centre behind us now. 

There’s levels to everything, right? 

I was a hockey fan before I was an NHL player. So I feel like I am completely unbiased when I say that there’s playoff hockey, and then there’s playoff hockey in Montréal.

And then there’s a whole other tier, which is Friday Night Playoff Hockey in Montréal. 

We were obviously disappointed not to get home ice, but when that schedule came out, and we saw Game 3 at the Bell Centre on a Friday night, everybody was just grinning ear to ear, like….

F*** me. This is gonna be insane. 

We know that it’s going to be absolutely rocking tomorrow night.

And I know what you’re thinking. Cole, are you crazy? You’re dropping this masterpiece in the middle of a playoff series? Shouldn’t you be napping? 

I am currently napping. 

I actually did this right before the series, and I told the folks at The Players’ Tribune to only drop this before our first home game, to make sure you were all fired up. I hope I did a good job. Any little edge, right?

We’re not last year’s team. I think everybody can see that. We took a lot from losing that Washington series. They pushed us around. They owned us, point blank. But we learned from that failure and came back a tighter group this season, and a big credit goes to Nick and his leadership, and obviously to Marty. 

To be coached by one of the legends of the sport.... I wish I could be cool about it, but it’s just insane to get to learn from him every day. Marty has really helped evolve my game, and I think so much of it is breaking down what I’m seeing without the puck. People think scoring goals is about having the puck on your stick, but 90% of the goal happens before you get the puck. 

It’s like Marty always says…. “Don’t play on your rollerblades.”

Basically, it means that hockey is all about starting and stopping and not drifting through a good space. Especially in the playoffs, the space is so tight that you can’t be playing roller hockey out there. You have to park in those open spaces when you see them. I just feel like Marty has all the answers, and it’s an honor to be able to sit in a video session with a guy I grew up watching. He’s a big part of the reason I got 50 this year, and another huge part is obviously my teammates. 

My teammates…. Look, I won’t go down the whole list, because we gotta keep these guys humble. But just a special shoutout to Nick for all the assists. I can assure you he’s much louder away from the rink. The Quiet Leader branding is really solid though. He’s the real deal when it comes to a captain who leads by example. 

And then obviously Lane, who can’t stop breaking records. His work ethic is so ridiculous that it probably looks weird to some people how much time he spends on the ice. This game is all he cares about. I’ve never seen somebody happier to be out there every day. To be this good this young is unbelievable, and he definitely pushes our group. 

And then I guess I have to include Slaf, even though I spend almost every day with the guy. Everybody can see why we took him number 1 now. I don’t even know how good he can be — it’s scary. The whole league should be terrified of what he can become. Slaf’s only issue is that he can’t seem to figure out how American garage doors work. He timed it wrong with the parking gate coming out of my building and crunched his entire hood. I think the car was brand-spanking new. He drove to the first home game and then immediately totaled it in the most comical, slow-motion way possible. He’s been carpooling to games with Demi ever since. I don’t know what mechanic he’s been dealing with, but I think he got hosed. He just got his car back now, six months later. 

Something like that could only happen to Slaf. He’s the best. 

To me, hockey is the best sport because you really can’t do it alone. Scoring 50 this year was awesome, but it was such a team accomplishment. And really, it’s about the whole atmosphere that you’re in. The Bell Centre has been incredible all season, and to score number 50 there in front of all you guys, and with my dad in the building … that was such a great wave to ride into these playoffs. 

I think most people have probably seen the clip of my dad crying in the stands. Me and my brother were cracking up, because of course he’s wearing a Brewers cap. The guy’s son plays for the Habs and he’s weeping on camera in the quarter-zip and the Brew Crew hat. I guess he had Opening Day fever. Classic. (Security, don’t let him in the building tomorrow without a Habs hat on.)

I guess if you just see my dad’s tears, it’s a cool moment for social media or whatever. But you have to understand all the hours in the car that went into that moment, not just from my dad but from my mom and so many of my teammates’ parents along the way....  Yeah, all I can do is say thank you. You drove me here to this moment, literally. 

But hey, we had a blast out there on the road, didn’t we, old man? 

Thanks for all the miles. 

And thanks in advance to our fans for going absolutely ballistic tomorrow night.

— Cole